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Papa Bert Meets Paul Johnson, a True Sippin' Seat Fan

Bert — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 20:32:00 GMT

As a proud graduate of Georgia Tech I was thrilled to have lunch with Paul Johnson today at Fox Sports Grill in Atlanta, GA. As head coach of the Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets, he has posted a great first season record of 7-3 so far.

Special thanks to Mike from 790 The Zone for introducing Paul and Wes Durham to the Sippin' Seat a couple weeks ago. After fighting over the only seat that Mike had, they decided to invite my wife and I for lunch today. I presented Paul with a Sippin' Seat and he was kind enough to sign one for me.

As an added bonus, I was joined at our table by Keith Homes, a member of the 1990 Georgia Tech National Championship Team (#30). It is always fun to see a National Championship ring up close and his did not disappoint. He was also kind enough to sign a Sippin' Seat for me.

Go Jackets!

Brett Favre Mid season Report Card

Bob — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 20:04:00 GMT

Halfway through the 2008 campaign and Brett Favre deserves an Incomplete for his efforts with the Jets. His team is 5-3 and tied for the AFC East lead. He's tied for third in passing touchdowns, is first in interceptions and is middle of the pack in passer rating. But the "Incomplete" is mainly because I instituted a Favre boycott before the season started and therefore feel unqualified to have an opinion. The endless off season Favre talk forced me to do it and it's been one of the best decisions I've ever made. I don't watch any Jets games and turn the channel when his highlights are on. The boycott has been a lot easier to maintain than I imagined. I have had to skip a lot of Sportscenter and a couple of national games, but not hearing any more talk about the "greatest player ever" has been refreshing. By no means have I been able to totally escape Broadway Brett. There's a geek at my work who stood by the water cooler one day wearing wranglers and raving about six touchdowns.

Prior to the endless "Favre is the only story in sports" retiring/unreTIRING saga I was by no means a jersey wearing member of the 4's flock, but I did enjoy watching him play. Then the spotlight shined and the attention far outweighed his or anybody else's accomplishments. The weeks of praise/scrutiny of his career persisted because of the fact that career records are all about playing in a lot of games. Favre having the career good (touchdowns) and the bad (interceptions) merely points out that longevity is what is being celebrated more than the player's ability. Note Vinny Testaverde and Drew Bledsoe both top-ten in career passing. However, Favre is indisputably tops in one inspiring category. Along with Rush Limbaugh, they are the only people I can think of who achieved much higher salaries after pill addiction. Now that’s the stuff of legends.

While I can't grade Brett's 08 season, I can give the boycott experiment an "A+". I've since instituted one for Chris Berman. The self-serving star of the four-letter network has always made me shout four-letter words. He's such a D!@#. It's refreshing to never again sit through a segment called Two Minute Drill that takes five-and-a-half minutes. It was unfortunate that I wasn't able to hear his interview with John McCain and Bar-ack-ack-ack Obama. I'm sure Edward R. Murrow would have been impressed. While you do miss a few things with boycotts, the less-stress sports viewing is well worth it. I recommend you try the boycott too. Oh wait, you already did with the Phillies/Rays World Series.

Happy Halloween! Top Ten Scariest, Freakiest, Spookiest Things In Sports

Bob — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 07:20:00 GMT

Top Ten Scariest, Freakiest, Spookiest Things In Sports

10) The seductive play by play of Pam Ward
9)   Padraig Harrington’s Teeth
8)   That Bald U.S. Gymnast
7)   Al Davis
6)   “Now to the Sidelines, Here’s Holly Rowe”
5)    Phil Mickelson’s Nipples
4)   O.J. Simpson
3)   “I now pronounce you Mrs. Larry Johnson”
2)   Chris Cooley’s Playbook
1)   Stuart Scott’s Eye

Best Conference To Bed

Bob — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 07:25:00 GMT

It's hard to escape all the best conference in the nation talk. It's an annual season-long discussion that generates countless television reports, radio talk rants and online posts. Who cares??? If you've ever chanted S-E-C instead of the name of your team you are D-U-M-B. A passionate Auburn fan would much rather see Bama winless instead of undefeated, despite the latter serving as some silver lining in a cloudy season.

I agree the Southeastern Conference is usually the best, but I disagree with what seems like the majority of the college football nation just blindly accepting it as so every year. This year, the Big 12 does have a great argument. With the Big 12 South having four of its six members in the top eight of the first Bowl Championship Standings of 2008, there should be no arguing the toughest division in the nation.

I point out the SEC because so many of its fans are extremely passionate about the best conference claim. It's the fans of the mediocre teams that whine the most about conference pride. "We're 6-6, but we play in the toughest conference." Guess what, you're 6-6 because you're not very good. "Our league bowl record is awesome." Wow, the 5th best SEC team beat the Sun Belt champ. Shocker! I'm sure Vegas had it as an even line. When Florida won the 2006 championship, they did, not the conference. Florida has the same number of titles in the last decade as two other schools in the sunshine state, and the Gators and Seminoles have two overall to Miami's five in the last 25 years. That makes history a pointless angle, while also solidifying Florida as the frontrunner to win the ever popular best state in college football discussion.

"But top to bottom?" Does anyone really believe the Wildcats, Gamecocks, Commodores, Volunteers, Razorbacks, Croomdogs, Rebels and Tubertigers are tough this year? None of those eight would be guaranteed a title if they switched conferences. At best they would bring another good but not great squad to the good but not great conferences. The ACC could take any of them and still be a league where it seems no members want the hassle of a conference title game appearance. If they all joined the WAC, Boise State would still be in the run for that conference's crown and would still be tough to beat on their home blue turf.

Where the SEC differs from the ACC, Big East and other lesser leagues is at the top. The Gators and Tide are clearly at the elite level this year, with LSU and the Richtdogs in the conversation while seeming to be on the second rung of the national ladder. But none of it matters because by year's end only one of them can possibly claim a crystal trophy named after whatever company can still afford to buy the BCS hardware naming rights. Besides, the best conference this year is clearly the Mid American. That's because Florida defeated the defending champion LSU Tigers, Ole Miss beat Florida, but lost to Wake Forest, who lost to Navy, which lost to Ball State. That's right, undefeated Ball State. M-A-C, M-A-C, M-A-C!!!

Unconscious Collins

Bob — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 21:27:00 GMT

It's great to have Kerry Collins back as an NFL starter. I'm sure Titans fans are happy due to the undefeated start and they should all send Vince "Psycho V" Young a thank you. Collins has always been one of my favorites. It has nothing to do with his ability, but his drinking. Collins has the distinction of being one of the most hammered people I've ever seen at a college football game. It was early in his pro career at a University of South Carolina opener in Columbia. Collins was a Panther pup and hanging out with pro teammate and former Gamecock Matthew Campbell. Collins was a few rows in front of me when a guy from a couple rows back hollered out Hey Collins. Kerry wobbled around and with some WWE-type flexing shouted “How Bout Dem Panthurrrzzz.” Spit shrapnel reached two sections over. The crowd cheered and Kerry let out a grin. Every few plays during the first quarter-and-a-half he'd turn around, do his best Hogan and slur out another how bout dem. Each time the crowd cheered less and Collins laughed harder. This was in the pre-Papa Bert days and Collins had his beverage of choice in a plastic soda bottle. Midway through the second quarter Collins was escorted out of the section by his pals. Injured players need less support getting helped off the field. For Halloween that year I dressed as Collins...I put my hat on backwards and got smashed. Good times.

Now that Kerry's back in action (64-of-115 for 740 yards with 3 TDs and 3 INTs through week Six), it may be a while until he's back in the stands in the same state as many others and me. Hopefully by then Kerry will have found this website. That way he can be a little less obvious with his spirits. I know Collins claims to have put his drinking days behind him, but I doubt he'll be able to pass up the nice discount Papa Bert gives to those who have played Quarterback in the Super Bowl. Just ask Joe Namath or Suzy Kolber.

Papa Bert's Fully Loaded Drinking Package Makes the News

Bert — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 22:01:00 GMT

Special thanks to Philip Martin of the Arkansas Democrat-gazette for their wonderful article on sneaky drinking featuring Papa Bert's Fully Loaded Drinking Package which, if you didn't already know, enables you to sneak 123 shots, 13 beers, or 6.2 bottles of wine into any event!

Click here to read the article.

Dusty Higgins also created an amazing cartoon...

What's Up Doc?

Bob — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 22:58:00 GMT

If you live in ACC Country, you’re lucky. Not only do you get to see the best conference in action each week, you get the best commentator in college football via the Raycom Sports ACC Game of the Week. Former Redskin Rick “Doc” Walker is one of a kind. Here is some of his insight while working the Clemson/NC State game:

“They’re starting to walk the dog up front for the baby Tigers. They’re pretty talented, they’re just young. They’re cutting their teeth, and right now they’re taking a bite out of the apple.”

“We need a field cam, turn the field into an aquarium. You’d see everything.”

“If they don’t get more points on the board, this dog ain’t gonna bring home the bacon.”

“Just run up in there man, like you’re trying to free a hostage.”

The ACC and Doc Walker…A Winning Tradition!

No More Steve Spurrier

Bob — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 23:35:00 GMT

Thanks for the intro Papa Bert! I am glad to be part of the team!

I wanted to write a thank you note to the Vanderbilt Commodores, but too lazy to look for an address and being a longtime user of the Papa Bert Sippin’ Seat I figure here is a good place to send my regards. Great win over South Carolina! Hopefully it will send a message to the powers at ESPN to quit putting the Gamecocks on Thursday so often. Back to back to start the season, why? Actually we all know why…Steve Spurrier.

The Ball Coach is hands down the most overrated in college football, and why there seems to be such widespread agreement over his greatness is dumbfounding. I know he won at Duke, but the ACC has never exactly been the pinnacle of performance, especially currently (kudos Tommy Bowden). He did have an amazing run at Florida, but most coaches would have. Urban Meyer has practically equaled his success in only a few seasons. Meyer has the national title but trails in SEC championships. That’s one of the problems with Spurrier. He’s the Bobby Cox of football. All those times he won the mighty SEC and his only national championship was as undeserved as the praise being given to Sarah Palin (shagable shouldn’t be the main reason you’re picked as VP nominee). The 96 Gators got a rematch with a Florida State team that had already defeated them. Their bowl victory was therefore worthy of only the co-state championship. I now reside in northern Virginia and it’s nice to be in an area where there’s no shortage of Skins fans ready to point out Spurrier’s flaws.

The Gamecocks dropped the ball when they hired Steve. The other USC continues to mistakenly believe past greatness elsewhere is the best shot at future success in Williams-Brice Stadium. Spurrier is Lou part two. The university needs to focus on finding a young assistant that can stay a spell and finally give the most loyal fans in the nation the wins they crave. Georgia looks really wise for hiring Mark Richt so why don’t the Gamecocks take a shot on a Patrick Nix (now OC at Miami), or a Charlie Strong (DC at Florida, has been with the cocks)? Instead, they go the corpse route. The school should have considered looking at the man responsible for their latest defeat. Bobby Johnson has been respectable in one of the most challenging jobs in college football. Johnson would make an attractive candidate because he’s a South Carolina native and was fabulous as the top man at Furman. He did play at Clemson, but Spurrier was also the enemy once and now there’s countless around Columbia sporting visors and not going to bowl games.

Another problem with Johnson may be the fact that he runs a clean program. Spurrier appears to believe the any news is good news mantra and recruits the most upstanding individuals. If you can’t win on the field, at least make waves with the police blotter. Johnson would also put the team and university ahead of his own ego, which couldn’t possibly have been welcome after Holtz. So, the Cocks have Spurrier, and he’s convinced he’s not to blame for delivering exactly what he was hired not to do. It’s probably too late for Johnson anyway. Clemson may be calling by year’s end.

Thank you so much Vandy for hopefully opening a few eyes about the Bill Parcells of the college ranks. Media-made coaching legends should be banned along with celebration flags (no, I’m not a Husky fan). Hopefully ESPN will be wary of more Gamecock appearances on Thursday and will instead opt for an Erin Andrews special. Now she would make a great Vice President.

Welcome Bobby Wayne to Papa Bert

Bert — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 23:27:00 GMT

I am very proud to welcome Bobby Wayne to the Papa Bert family!!!

Bob has a rich background in marketing and public relations. He also has extensive experience in media channels such as radio, television, and the internet. He is well versed in almost all sports and is a walking sports and television encyclopedia.

Bob will be wearing many hats at Papa Bert including product development, marketing, public relations, operations, and (best of all) Bob will be providing content on our blog which I am sure will be both informative and entertaining.

Please join me in welcoming Bob!

You can reach him any time via email at bob@papabert.com.

Thanks!
Bert

Lowering the Drinking Age from 21 to 18

Bert — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 10:04:00 GMT

What a major announcement! Of all the people to support lowering the drinking age from 21 to 18 I would never have thought that the college presidents from the big universities (Duke, Dartmouth, Ohio State, Syracuse, Tufts, Colgate, etc) would be the leaders of it. But, it is smart since it will relieve some of the university liability of constantly trying to stop underage drinking...which is probably impossible. My gut feel says it will never pass but it will be fun to watch them try.

It just seems right that if you are old enough to defend your country in war that you should be old enough to legally drink, right? The only problem is working through the social impacts of the change.

But, on the bright side, you could give Papa Bert Sneaky Drinking gifts as high school graduation presents in addition to college graduation presents ;)

http://edition.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/08/18/college.drinking.age.ap/

Cheers!
Bert